You Are The 99 Percent

Champions League April 27: Mourinho enjoys the view from a small step while hairy man tries desperately to lick him....

2011-04-28T11:32:00.001+10:00

Room with a view. Jose Mourinho enjoys the better part of the second half in the stands with a hairy man tying to lick his face.

This mornings match was yet again another typical Mourinho performance. All the build up was brilliantly orchestrated by the special one, resulting in one of the more heated Classico's in recent years, brilliant stuff.

Shame it didn't pay off.

Before Pepe's red card I think it would have ended a draw, the game was scrappy and compact with both sides squeezing the shit out of each other.

How 'Lass' Diara didn't get 8 yellow cards is beyond me. The man was raping everything on the pitch.

Pepe was hard done by for the occasion.

Messi did what he does and won it for Barca. Magic.

Mourinho's post match presser was hilarious and I'm sure a size 48 UEFA boot will be up his ass by nightfall.

Cant wait for the return leg.

The royal wedding is almost among us!!!!!!!!

2011-04-25T01:34:00.002+10:00

Why does anyone give a fuck about the royal wedding? They are just two human beings having a fucking wedding. Everyone does it, who gives a shit.

Apparently Australian's do???!!! Every fucking time I move my eyeballs in another direction I am bombarded with this horse shit!!

What will she wear? Who will be on the guest list? Where will they honeymoon? How many tits is she gonna flop out? How this is even remotely interesting to anyone is beyond my small brains comprehension.

I'm sorry, I just can't see the point in making this the story of the century. Give it a mention, ok, fine, I can deal with that but front page top story headlines for two weeks? Fuck my face off.

Anyone who is interested in this shit is a deadshit, kill yourself, you are wasting my air. How is this wedding going to add to your life? If you answered more than zero in your tiny pea dick head.... Fuck you.

Get a fucking life.

Do you feel like you've lost your soul after doing this?

2011-04-24T03:26:00.001+10:00

I don't know why I do this, but I do, and after I've done it, I'm left feeling dead inside.

What could I be doing to leave me in such a state?

LAUGHING SYMPATHETICALLY AT UNFUNNY PEOPLES JOKES

What does this achieve you wonder?

Well, nothing positive.

A dipshit will come up to me and say hello, I'll greet them and have a quick chat about their day bla bla dick. They then feel the need to try and say something funny.... This is where it all turns to shit. I'm talking about the retards who you don't consider a friend, but think you like them at least enough to bare their attempts at humor.

They hit you with one of their pathetic jokes and what do you do? It's so shit I feel like telling them to stop breathing, but instead I laugh..... I laugh convincingly too!

I don't entirely understand why I feel the need to give unfunny morons sympathy laughs but I do it and it makes my balls hurt. Now some may think this is just being polite, which it is. One problem I have with it all is the fact that once you give someone that first fake laugh, you open the floodgates for years of painful fucking retard jokes which you also will have to laugh at to continue on the niceness!

I want to stab them in the groin with a blunt object. It can't just be me who has encountered this shit. This is a disease....

And it must be stopped!!!

- Posted by me

Holy shit it has been a while.... But why you say, WHY!!?

2011-04-24T02:47:00.001+10:00

Don't give a fuck that's why.

- Posted by me

BULLSHIT

2010-08-29T16:43:00.001+10:00

Ok so I'm at work as I write this. Looking at the retard that just came in to do a freelance shift. A few minutes into the day he notices im wearing a soccer jersey, he announces that he is a massive soccer fan, watches it ALL THE TIME.

Last nights Prem League match highlights come on the telly. He sees a goal scored by Man Utd and then acts as if he was all excited about how awesome the goal was, and in fairness it was a nice goal. One problem. He referred to the goal..... as a fucking TRY. Yes. A TRY. As in the rugby try.

All credibility that he had (not much) is now gone. He has, however taught me a valuable lesson about bullshit.
If your gonna do it. don't get caught, or you really look like a fucking moron.

THERES ALWAYS ONE

2010-08-28T02:55:00.000+10:00

Every fuckin job ive ever had, every single one, ive had a blast. Whether it be from cooking chicken at the local KFC, to directing news bulletins, I've had a blast. There's just one thing that plagues my near perfect fun times at work, its the fucking one cunt that everyone hates but for some reason wont leave.

You know the one I'm talking about right? He/she is the fucking moron who talks too much about what they know. The one who is socially retarded in every way. The one who hears a joke made by a coworker and then repeats it 45 mins later, still in the presence of that very same coworker. The one who thinks they know best at all times. The one who everyone wants to secretly kill behind their back.

Why is there a fucking dead shit in every workplace? What is it about these people that they can a) get hired in the first place and b) don't get fired. Well usually these people are pretty decent at their job. Despite the fact they are universally and obliviously hated, they still keep punching on. These people usually are very bad at reading cues, for example they try to talk to you, you answer quickly, your body is turning away you clearly want to get away, they keep going and going and going.

They have terrible people skills. They are usually very self centred and only really ask questions about you to set up their own gloat sesh. Do you have people like this in your workplace?

if so, please let me know how to get rid of them. NOW

THE INVENTION OF LYING (movie) IS FUCKING SHIT BUT......

2010-08-24T15:27:00.000+10:00

Ok so my movie viewing isn't what it used to be, namely because of the horse shit that has been on show for the better part of the last 7 years. Maybe sin city was truly the best and last movie Ive seen for about 5 years.

So, I watched The invention of lying last night and it was horrifically terrible ricky Gervais is brilliant in his shows but his films have left a lot to be desired and this film is no different. It was not funny at all. The world in which no one could lie was terribly set up and no comedy came from anyone telling the truth. bla bla bla the film was shit.

But... one thing that I Fucking loved!!!!! and has lifted the films score from zero to about a 6 or 7, is the fact that religion is fuckin dragged through the dirt, BOOM!!

Ricky gervais in the film, in order to make people feel happy, in the film tells them all that there is a man in the sky who does good and bad things bla bla bla. Basically touting religion as a lie. FUCK YES I love that shit. MUCH RESPECT FOR MAKING GOD THE BUT OF A FUCKING JOKE FOR ONCE well done sir.

Apart from that hilarity, the film is a complete waste of time.

6.5 for god bashing
1.1 without

ARE YOU POPULAR...?

2010-08-23T18:02:00.000+10:00

Popularity is more important than hard slog labor. do you work your arse off? Are you sweating over the deadlines whilst others cruise on by? There is a reason for this, it's because the individuals at work with better charisma charm and people skills are always Going to have a better chance at getting ahead than Joe hard slog no personality.

Why?

People, all people, whether they are a superior or just a co-worker want to be entertained, they too want to enjoy the working day. By associating with the fun easy going individuals, others enjoy their work day more. These individuals make work worth turning up for, and are a bonus to have in any company.

Just remember getting good at your job is only half the battle. Being socially inept will see you lose out time and time again. Are you making the workplace come alive? If not, you may just be setting yourself up for mass progress halt.

HAVENT POSTED IN A WHILE....WHY?

2010-08-20T18:43:00.002+10:00

I don't give a fuck.

Thats why.

Beware the bringer of gifts

2010-08-20T18:42:00.000+10:00

I am constantly surprised by the number of people who feel it necessary to bring in food and sweets for other people at work. Why do they do this? Why do they feel the need to bring in shit for us to consume, can we not feed ourselves, are they just being nice? I have a better explanation.

Anyone who constantly gives gifts or brings in sweets and or other goods for their workmates, is the loser of the office. I say office, but I refer to any workplace. These are the people that are usually fat. They have very low levels of self esteem and the only way they think they are going to win friends is by giving away food and sweets and so on.

There is generosity yes, but generosity comes from a different place. Generosity is spontaneous, it is circumstantial kindness when help is needed. Gift giving is almost like calculated murder. You plan to give the gifts, so you can gain friendship in return.

Have a think about the types of people you know to be over givers. I think you will be shocked at how lacking in friends these people are...

STAND OUT FROM THE CROWD

2010-08-01T09:58:00.000+10:00

Treat your boss like one of your mates if not less.

I find that in all my working life I have had excellent rapport with my bosses. Some to the extent where I really should have been fired many times over but due to our friendship, my laziness and work flaws were magically overlooked.

From about month number one into a job I find it completely fine to start addressing your boss as mate or as I like to use, 'young man'. This is friendly and subtly lets the boss know that you wont be intimidated by his position.

I also love to use the 'here's trouble' line whenever I see a superior. They secretly love to be thought of as cool and mischievous even if they clearly are not. Theres a whole range of situations like these that you can exploit and in turn stand out from the crowd of scared little sheep that make up your workspace.

Most people are boring, theres no doubt about it so it wont be too difficult to stand out in such a world. Doing things that subordinates usually wouldn't do (don't overdo it) will get you a step ahead of joe boring who sits at his desk for 10 hours and says nothing.

Are you a stand out at work?
or are you the 99%?

note:
If your boss happens to be like Ricky Gervais, you wont even need to be his mate, you'll already have the upper hand on that stupid son of a bitch.

HOW TO DEAL WITH THE WORKPLACE ARSEHOLES

2010-07-31T15:22:00.001+10:00

People at the top are usually nice, welcoming, easygoing, well tempered sane individuals. They are like this because they are at the top and are confident and secure of their own existence.

People at the next level down from the top are usually the complete opposite. They want you to think they are at the top. They try and give the illusion that they are at the top end of the spectrum, and they may well be, but if they are not the top I can guarantee one thing. THEY ARE MASSIVE FUCKING CUNTS.

These are the low life fuckers you will come across when going into almost any job. These guys are the cunts who wont talk to you out of fear of being seen with you, a lesser individual. An individual who will 'kill' their rep in the company. BULLSHIT.

They will be short with you and generally just not speak to you even if you speak to them. They will do everything they can, not to help you out and will pretty much drive you insane.

These people will only turn to you when you are on level footing with them in the company. So guess what, fuck them. Put them aside and get on with what it is you should be doing, befriending everyone else and turning them against those who chose to write you off.

The most satisfying part of working life for me personally is to see my coworkers, due to my increased popularity, slowly but surely turn against those who I secretly fucking hate. Little tidbits of information and tales of dislike will open peoples eyes to the cunt they really are. Your new work friends will unite and eventually take these mother fuckers down in a blazing inferno of glory!

Think before you treat the new kid like shit, because the new kid may just be a social genius. Treat him with kindness and he will walk happily by… treat him like a piece of shit and he may just fuck your life.

And you didn't even know it was him.

CUNT

MY THOUGHTS ON RESPECT

2010-07-30T05:02:00.000+10:00

Respect is a term that gets thrown at me all the time. Why? Apparently I have very little. Now I believe you must earn respect, so when I start a new job or meet someone new I expect them to understand this unwritten law. I am not going to pander to your pussy ass ego and make you feel like you deserve the respect right off the bat. I don't fucking know ya! You could be a rapist murderer by night and a fucking CEO by day.

Respect, In my eyes takes time to build. You cant announce your so called 'title' and expect everyone to drop their shit and come running to praise you...wait. Most people probably will, but why? These are the deluded individuals that think by sucking their superiors asses they are gonna get somewhere. This may work for a time, but it will die out in the long run. People deep down want to be challenged, they want to see you have a sense of self worth, go against the norm, demand some respect for yourself but don't overdo it.

Just keep those sons of bitches guessing whether you respect them or not. Early on they may feel uncomfortable with you not adhering to their rules but after a short while you will rise to the top of their mental charts. They will never let you know that you are on 'their side' but you will know.

Note: If someone needs to ask you to respect them, they have some underlying self esteem issues. Don't make that apparent to them or anyone else, jut take the information as a sign they have a weakness inside, a weakness which may very well see them working for you one day.

SIMPLE STEPS TO LIKEABILITY

2010-07-30T04:42:00.000+10:00

If people think you are enjoying their company, they will tend to like you more. If you are openly bored by them in every way, most people will get the hint and steer clear of you.

Note: Im assuming you are putting these skills to practise in the workplace for your own personal rise up the corporate ladder. If you genuinely like someone thats great, but if you don't, you must fake it till you make it.

If someone is trying to be funny, act like you find it funny. If they are telling you something important to them but fuck all meaningful to yourself, act like it is important too! Get my drift? be fluid, like everyone and everyone will like you. Being a person of this nature is very important in office politics because one bad word from someone more popular than yourself will spread like wild fire, no-one wants to associate themselves with THAT guy.

Along the way you will find people that you fucking hate and want to murder over and over again. People will push you to your very limits, but you must stay strong. Like and be liked. If you are hating on everyone, then everyone will hate you.

WHY WIKILEAKS COULD SAVE OUR LIVES

2010-07-29T12:57:00.001+10:00

The recent news touting wikileaks as a matter of national security is bullshit. The government will call it anything it needs to make the public genuinely believe their lives are in danger as a result of these leaks.

Information in these documents needs to be made public full stop. Why? when documents suggesting any individual can be detained, hunted or killed without trial, should be enough to suggest that anyone on this planet is a 'suspect'.

If you go against the governments wishes you may well be labelled a terrorist. They have the powers whether via the media or other ways to destroy any citizens life.

99% of the population believe that if you don't do anything wrong you will be fine. Not if they decide you are a convenient scape goat your not. Anyone can be detained or killed and they can just lie about what you were doing.

Easy done.

SHOCKING WIKILEAKS

Whats funny is that wikileaks is, in my opinion, just the tip of the gigantic iceberg of information out there that we do not know.

Why would the government lie to its people? NO WAY!! why would they? What do they gain from hiding this stuff??

MONEY AND POWER over YOU and I.

Information is power. Power that the public need, to protect us from the powers that be.

HEY NEWS.... YOUR SHIT

2010-07-23T02:11:00.000+10:00

Lindsay Logan goes to jail. Who gives a flying fuck? Well apparently everyone as its been picked up by every fucking news network in the world. Why do people take such an interest in this stuff? Well, the media can be to blame.

Our lives are continually being led by media preference. We care about this shit because that's what they feed us. We are so conditioned to take in and then converse about the 'news' that we lap it up with no rejection. Take a step back. How much do you give a rats cunt that this washed up druggo slut is now in jail? Why do you care? Please tell me, I want to know. There must be something better to do than following this drug fuck whores path to jail?

Stories that gain so much popularity saddens me but also makes me pretty glad. Why? Because the more retards that lap up this shit means there are more individuals that are dumber than you and I. I’m no brain surgeon, don’t get me wrong, but I am disgusted by the shit that people are fascinated by in this day and age. The media can run anything they want. Think about that. They are feeding us garbage and we are becoming retards.

Get a fucking clue. Pull your shit together because as it stands, others are pulling it together for us, and cramming it right back up our ass.

Do you think for yourself?

Do you rely on the media to give you ‘news’ to make you feel smart?

Read a book. Travel. Do anything except watch the fuckin 6oclock news! It is making you dumber, and I…………. want to kill you more.

Black parents shock doctors with white baby

2010-07-21T18:09:00.000+10:00

So... Theres no DNA evidence that this baby is in fact the product of the man in the picture, but the entire world has dubbed this a miracle baby?

Until I see proof, I don't want to hear anyone tell me about this absolute horse shit story. Are we all fucking brain dead?

Why is this even in the news? Your wife fucked another bloke mate...

Wait. WAIT!!

This may be genius in disguise . If indeed the husband has his doubts, he has done the right thing. Hopefully this bullshit leads to a public test! The man gets his answer (she cheated on him) the woman kills herself not being able to cope with the shame.

You brilliant bastard, man in picture. Hats off to you sir!

Fucking 99%

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS

2010-07-20T17:27:00.002+10:00

I'm back to work and hence have exponentially less time to write, let alone stay awake past 3pm, but I'm back!! and with part one of what I will call the how to make friends series or better yet! How to not be hated by everyone.

PART 1: THE KNOW IT ALL

No one likes a know it all.

If you are that guy / girl in the office who has the first answer to everyones question or goes out of your way to let everyone know the vast knowledge you have on a particular subject, I guarantee you are being laughed at behind your back.

Everyone wants to think they are intelligent. If you takeover every situation with your answers, they are associating you! With them not being smart. Big mistake. It is almost always in most situations better to act like you are genuinely surprised by things that people tell you. Eg.

A workmate tells you there are new speed cameras coming on july 16.

Is your response:

a ) Yeah! Everyone knows that.

b ) Oh really? Well, we better not speed then.

If you chose A, you may fall into the category known as the know-it-all. Even If you knew what they were telling you just act like it was news to you, people subconsciously feel better thinking they just added to your life. Perfecting this art takes practice but once implemented your on your way to making friends every time you converse with people.

Sometimes it's better to hold your tongue, let someone else have the light, you will soon notice people may talk to you, instead of laughing at you, behind your back.

Give it a try.

iPhone 4 Review brought to you by the legends at Engadget!!!

2010-07-18T20:14:00.001+10:00

DO ENJOY!

HOW GULLIBLE ARE YOU?

2010-07-15T23:28:00.000+10:00

I'm fascinated by persuasion. I wonder how persuasive I am? I'm always skeptical of anyone that tries to tell me to do something / sell me something for their benefit. I have zero interest in politics and have no direct contact with politicians whatsoever, but I am becoming ever more skeptical of them.

What is their purpose? Do they really care for you and I? Do they really want to make it a better place for us to live? Why are there only ever 2 real competitive parties in any democratic government? Why aren't there 15 choices?

We vote but does anything really change? Small level changes maybe, But what really changes for you and I.

I say fuck all.

We are bombarded with bullshit on a day to day basis via the TV news.

What are your first thoughts when I say ISRAEL?

Are you thinking bombs? Are you thinking constant bloodshed and terror?

Have you been to Israel?

If not, how do you come to such conclusions?

Where did you see such things?

Internet? News? Radio?

What if Israel has been falsely represented by one media outlet and repeated by another, and another and so on? What if it was a beautiful place with fun loving people?

Because I can tell you it is. It is a wonderful place and I urge anyone to visit, and I guarantee you will have a great time.

Imagine if the powers that be, above our prime ministers and politicians, powers that these individuals wouldn't even know about, have hijacked our sources of information? Couldn't they just tell us what they wanted us to hear?

For what? For whatever they need.

I mean if we see it with our own eyes, it must be true right?

How gullible are we?

I think we, as a species need to look deeper into these types of issues. Lets say hypothetically you are a child killer. You are put in front of a camera which beams that feed to every household on earth. You are asked the dreaded question did you kill that child?

You answer yes. You are now a child killer and the world hates and probably wants to kill you. If you answer no, you are free, the world has let you off the hook.

Does this not still make you a child killer?

Control information and you control perception.

Mass media can change world perception with one story. Does that mean that story is true? Ask questions before being fed answers.

How gullible are you?

MIND OF A SALESMAN - I am soooooo much better than you.

2010-07-15T20:10:00.010+10:00

Every time I go into an electronics store in this country Im harassed by salesmen. Then when I tell them I'm just having a look they constantly ask a look at what?

Ill fucking let you know mate, when I've decided what it is I'm fucking looking at.

When you finally do find something and are in need of assistance

(from another salesmen coz the first one is always the store cunt)

the guy is rude about product availability, he starts asking questions about why you would want it etc, generally the most condescending dick you can probably come in contact with in a retail outlet in Sydney.

Me "Hey boss, you got any X in stock"

Sales Clerk "Oh haha we are like sold out"

Me "when are you getting more in?"

Sales Cunt "oh haha oh, they come in daily"

Me "so you're getting more in today?"

Sales Cunt "aah yeah we get more in liiiiike every day...."

Me "ok sweet can you contact me when they come in?"

Sales Cunt "I don't know how many we're liiiiiiike getting, and I don't know what time they are liiiiike going to get here."

Me "cool heres my number let me know when they arrive"

Sales Cunt "hahaha no. we actually aren't meant to liiiiiike just sell them... we cant take down liiiiiike the number of everyone who wants one so yeeeeeeeeeaah.

Thanks for your help RETARD.

What am I supposed to do. Stand in the store for 8 hours and wait for them to come in? Do I visit every hour on the fuckin hour and ask the cunt the same question?

Fuck it!

Electronic stores in Australia are shit. Not all, but most.

Friendly = Sales

Cunts = Fuck off I'm never shopping here again.

Online is the way to go if you don't want to deal with people who:

a) Cant speak english

b) Think they are better than you

c) Are cunts

HEY FANATICS!! YOU ARE SHIT.

2010-07-15T01:56:00.000+10:00

First of all I want to say much respect to all the Australians who got overseas and supported the Socceroos during this years world cup.

Much, much respect.

Though I... Do have some issues....

The Australian Fanatics:

If you haven't heard of the Fanatics, they are a bunch of sporting supporters who travel the globe in support of Australia. Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for country support, But if you are going to support the socceroos you better do some fucking research before you turn up to a game in the thousands (once again, much respect) to then sit down the entire match and relax with your chilli dog and beer.

Well done in getting the numbers out to the games, welly welly well done, but you, as a collective group of sporting fans are the worst I have ever seen at any Socceroos match in my life. Game one we came up against the might of Germany, a game in which we needed the crowd support most. Standing in a group of 15 - 20 was little o'l me and some die hard Socceroos supporters belting out cheers in support of our great nation, when what do we hear? What do we fucking hear?

Some cunt yells out from the crowd telling us to sit down, poor soul can't see the game. Then he's joined by a bunch of his Fanatics mates jeering and yelling at the lot of us to sit the fuck down? Now, sorry if this came as a shock to me but when I'm at the football I do not take kindly to sitting down. So we basically shunned them and kept standing cheering on the boys. 8-10mins later we've got South African security on our ass telling us people cant see the fucking game and could we sit down.

Dobbed in by our own countrymen.

We all turn around and angrily tell them to get the fuck up. No deal. The Fanatics had won.

Sitting there pissed off their heads jeering the true fans who stand and support the team. Herein lies the major issue with most of our sporting fans. Ninety percent of you don't know fuck about football. Ninety percent of you weren't at Germany 2006 coz you didn't fucking think we'd make it, and you are fucking telling us to sit the fuck down? This is football you morons. This is not cricket! This is not fucking rugby league, we don't sit and only make noise when someone scores. WE CHEER AN HOUR BEFORE THE MATCH, LET ALONE THE ACTUAL MATCH!!

This is the biggest sport in the world, and we are playing on the largest stage! Respect to those of you who do get out and support Australia, but what I saw this year in South Africa was you, the fanatics, the bandwagon supporters, are more concerned about how long the fucking beer line is then getting your fat asses up and supporting the team, at the WORLD CUP!

Fanatics get great numbers, but you do fuck all when it counts. Take your stupid wanker hats and jackets and fuck off.

Alternatively stand up and support the team. Maybe you wont be as collectively hated by the actual football community.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE ? ? ?

FUCK RIGHT OFF !!!

CAN AUSTRALIA EVER WIN THE WORLD CUP ?

2010-07-12T20:26:00.000+10:00

Another World Cup over. A new nation crowned champions. Another lesson for Australian soccer? I do hope so. How can we, a football mino, become champions of the world?

There has been a lot of talk of getting a better coach after Pim Verbeek's struggles in this campaign but I'm not liking the smell of that cheese. Yes, we will need a new coach but in four, even eight years time, what are our players going to be like? We might get lucky! We might have 10 Harry Kewell's and 3 Schwarzer's, but i doubt it.

We are a sporting nation, and in turn, expect big things from all our sporting teams. Why have we dominated world cricket? Rugby union? League? Tennis? Swimming? The list goes on! Apologies if I've left out your preferential vote.

We are dominating these sports because as kids, we all love to play them. What Aussie kid hasn't played cricket in the back yard? Hell I don't even like the sport, in fact, I find it one of the most boring in the world, and even I, can hold my own on the pitch, whether it be with bat or ball, why? Because of my constant exposure and practice at a young age.

This goes for all sports in which we are world contenders. In my travels to Germany and just recently South Africa for Socceroos supporting duties, I spoke to many people of much more mature football cultures, namely Brazilians and Germans.

In Germany we went out every day and found a random soccer pitch beautifully covered with astroturf in almost every town we visited. Kids, teens and grown men were all playing against each other just for fun.

I was amazed at the amount of people playing soccer all over the country. In Australia during the summer the friggin goals get taken down! So you cant even go to a field and kick a friggin goal! Because there all bloody gone. I talked to a bunch of Brazilians just a couple of weeks ago in SA. I asked them why? WHY ARE YOU GUYS SO FREAKISHLY AWESOME! I mean these guys were 18, 19 year olds and would easily slot into the Socceroos team in any position.

I consider myself an adequate player, having played Futsal and outdoor all my life. These guys schooled the lot of us and I mean SCHOOLED(we had a friendly match on some random Johannesburg school field). As they shattered my somewhat massive ego, I thought to myself I've played all my life... 3, some years, 4 times a week and I cant touch these kids.

They told me that they hated playing on a full field "too much running" I was confused... Ronaldo... Kaka.... Ronaldinho! All play at the highest level and at one time or another have been named best in the world. He saw my face(WTF KID?) and went on to explain how kids in brazil grow up only playing one game, football. They play not to increase their fitness or to win a game no no...

They play to make it look beautiful. The more tricks you can do the more popular you are. Every Brazilian kids dream is to play football. Now I'm not suggesting we kill all our other sports and only raise kids on soccer, but do you get where I'm heading with this little debate? It's grass roots people, we have the answer its been proven in all our other sporting codes.

This is not news to most of us I'm sure, but someone needs to implement a strategy to go forward. Its not only a good coach that will help you win World Cup's, you need culture. You need a nation who understands what it is to play football and play it well. Fitness and speed, something Australian's have in abundance, are no match for football finesse. Football intelligence and football culture.

We can become world champions. It's not gonna happen over night. It's probably not gonna happen for a good 40 years, but we can do it if we adapt to the football culture that will take us there.

GET OVER HERE!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-07-12T17:18:00.000+10:00

This one snuck up on me. Actually, I was told about it by one of my mates last night as we watched the World Cup Final (well done Barcelona).

mate ) "you seen the Mortal Kombat trailer"
I ) "fuck! what"
mate ) "It look pretty good"

I left off the 's' in looks as my mate is asian and I enjoy friendly racism from time to time. So I just remembered and checked it out.

Hollywood is dying there is no doubt in my mind. I'm pretty sure Kill Bill no! Sin City!! Was the last film I enjoyed at the cinema. Apart from that, by god has there been some utter vile shit come out.

I mean, I'll watch it. It'll most likely be shithouse, but if we suspend all thought, put aside all reason and lower our collective expectations to zero It should be fun.

Hit up the trailer HERE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kd4HAtUEdAw

KORN CD OFFICIALLY OUT TODAY!!!!

2010-07-12T16:43:00.000+10:00

Yes, yes I know, I'm that guy who likes koRn. Every circle of friends has one and I'm him. Now let me take you on a short ass journey....

New Album in less then 30 words?

Pretty Damn SOLID!!!

I've been a die hard koRn fan since I was 12 years old. They got me into the whole metal thing and I've never turned back. In recent years even I can say my confidence in the bands ability to bring out one more decent album has not been sky high.

Take a Look in the mirror for me, was their last good album, not great, but good. Then came see you on the other side... it's best tracks were on the special edition CD.

Untitled I must say had some good tracks but not Korn-esque. Korn III, is pretty damn solid but I cant help think that my brain has come to this conclusion out of sheer desperation.

It has me going back again and again. Day by day it grows on me, whispering my name, "play me" "love me" and I may just be...

You want my rating Fine!!

7 / 10 so go pick up a copy at JB where I did 24.95 baby!!

mmmmmmmmmm KooooooRRRRn

CORRECT SPELLING IS FOR LOSERS.

2010-07-12T01:21:00.000+10:00

Sheeeeit I'm just playin. I don't actually beleive you are a loser if you spell correctly, I'm just covering my own arse when the spelling fairies come knocking.

Reading back some of my work(something I should do pre posting) I've realised how terrible my spelling can get. Apologies in advance to the spelling elite among us, I can spell most of the time so just get off my crack.

One thing I can spell? Spanish glory!!

Come on Barcelona!! or Spain if you prefer.

JABULAAAANNAAAA!!!

2010-07-11T05:05:00.000+10:00

I think I'm gonna get a Jabulani ball. For no other reason than to tell the world media to fuck off after I take that first sweet kick. The Teamgiest from germany was an unbelievable ball, the best ive ever used, and if I recall was panned by critics world wide for its unpredictability. It seems as though the only predictable thing in world cups these days is the conspiracy to get rid of adidas as the official ball supplier. I do feel as though all countries should get the ball at the same time..... socceroos 14 days before the tournament..... germany...... 14 months. When I say 14 I mean closer to 8 but it looks better on the eye to have number rhyms right?
Anyhow Im getting one and I bet its fuckin brilliant.

[photo of me doing mad jabulani 90metre bombs coming soon]

kathy griffin you are the most disgustingly shit comedian on earth

2010-07-11T04:01:00.000+10:00

Kathy Griffin you are an old non funny sack of red orangutan shit. Who actually thinks kathy griffin is funny? If you do, you are a fucking moron, no offence though. Life on the D list would be fucking setting the bar way to high for this dumb bitch. As you may have noticed this is what's on tv at 355am before the soccer starts over here.

oh oh!!! its on!! fuck of griffin. Come on Uruguay!!

PAUL THE OCTOPUS PREDICTS A GERMANY WIN!!!!

2010-07-10T17:43:00.000+10:00

I am going where no man, woman or child has gone before and am predicting a Uruguay victory over the shattered germans despite that friggin octopus and its awesome record and millions of fans and fast cars and beautiful women.

Not only were they embarrassed by real football against Spain mid-week, but they will succumb to a Forlan hat-trick and subsequent semi nude Uruguayan celebratory dance/runs to cap it all off MUHAHAHAHAHAH.

I am never wrong with my football predictions. All of this is going to happen.

sorry

2010-07-10T17:28:00.000+10:00

Oh I see you've accidentally managed to stumble upon this page. Sorry in advance.