HOW TO DEAL WITH THE WORKPLACE ARSEHOLES

People at the top are usually nice, welcoming, easygoing, well tempered sane individuals. They are like this because they are at the top and are confident and secure of their own existence. 

People at the next level down from the top are usually the complete opposite. They want you to think they are at the top. They try and give the illusion that they are at the top end of the spectrum, and they may well be, but if they are not the top I can guarantee one thing. THEY ARE MASSIVE FUCKING CUNTS. 

These are the low life fuckers you will come across when going into almost any job. These guys are the cunts who wont talk to you out of fear of being seen with you, a lesser individual. An individual who will 'kill' their rep in the company. BULLSHIT.  

They will be short with you and generally just not speak to you even if you speak to them. They will do everything they can, not to help you out and will pretty much drive you insane. 

These people will only turn to you when you are on level footing with them in the company. So guess what, fuck them. Put them aside and get on with what it is you should be doing, befriending everyone else and turning them against those who chose to write you off. 

The most satisfying part of working life for me personally is to see my coworkers, due to my increased popularity, slowly but surely turn against those who I secretly fucking hate. Little tidbits of information and tales of dislike will open peoples eyes to the cunt they really are. Your new work friends will unite and eventually take these mother fuckers down in a blazing inferno of glory! 

Think before you treat the new kid like shit, because the new kid may just be a social genius. Treat him with kindness and he will walk happily by… treat him like a piece of shit and he may just fuck your life.

And you didn't even know it was him. 

CUNT

MY THOUGHTS ON RESPECT

Respect is a term that gets thrown at me all the time. Why? Apparently I have very little. Now I believe you must earn respect, so when I start a new job or meet someone new I expect them to understand this unwritten law. I am not going to pander to your pussy ass ego and make you feel like you deserve the respect right off the bat. I don't fucking know ya! You could be a rapist murderer by night and a fucking CEO by day. 


Respect, In my eyes takes time to build. You cant announce your so called 'title' and expect everyone to drop their shit and come running to praise you...wait. Most people probably will, but why? These are the deluded individuals that think by sucking their superiors asses they are gonna get somewhere. This may work for a time, but it will die out in the long run. People deep down want to be challenged, they want to see you have a sense of self worth, go against the norm, demand some respect for yourself but don't overdo it. 


Just keep those sons of bitches guessing whether you respect them or not. Early on they may feel uncomfortable with you not adhering to their rules but after a short while you will rise to the top of their mental charts. They will never let you know that you are on 'their side' but you will know. 


Note: If someone needs to ask you to respect them, they have some underlying self esteem issues. Don't make that apparent to them or anyone else, jut take the information as a sign they have a weakness inside, a weakness which may very well see them working for you one day. 

SIMPLE STEPS TO LIKEABILITY

If people think you are enjoying their company, they will tend to like you more. If you are openly bored by them in every way, most people will get the hint and steer clear of you. 

Note: Im assuming you are putting these skills to practise in the workplace for your own personal rise up the corporate ladder. If you genuinely like someone thats great, but if you don't, you must fake it till you make it. 

If someone is trying to be funny, act like you find it funny. If they are telling you something important to them but fuck all meaningful to yourself, act like it is important too! Get my drift? be fluid, like everyone and everyone will like you. Being a person of this nature is very important in office politics because one bad word from someone more popular than yourself will spread like wild fire, no-one wants to associate themselves with THAT guy. 

Along the way you will find people that you fucking hate and want to murder over and over again. People will push you to your very limits, but you must stay strong. Like and be liked. If you are hating on everyone, then everyone will hate you. 

 

WHY WIKILEAKS COULD SAVE OUR LIVES

The recent news touting wikileaks as a matter of national security is bullshit. The government will call it anything it needs to make the public genuinely believe their lives are in danger as a result of these leaks. 

Information in these documents needs to be made public full stop. Why? when documents suggesting any individual can be detained, hunted or killed without trial, should be enough to suggest that anyone on this planet is a 'suspect'.

If you go against the governments wishes you may well be labelled a terrorist. They have the powers whether via the media or other ways to destroy any citizens life. 

99% of the population believe that if you don't do anything wrong you will be fine. Not if they decide you are a convenient scape goat your not. Anyone can be detained or killed and they can just lie about what you were doing. 

Easy done. 

SHOCKING WIKILEAKS

Whats funny is that wikileaks is, in my opinion, just the tip of the gigantic iceberg of information out there that we do not know. 

Why would the government lie to its people? NO WAY!! why would they? What do they gain from hiding this stuff??

MONEY AND POWER over YOU and I.

Information is power. Power that the public need, to protect us from the powers that be. 

HEY NEWS.... YOUR SHIT

Lindsay Logan goes to jail. Who gives a flying fuck? Well apparently everyone as its been picked up by every fucking news network in the world. Why do people take such an interest in this stuff? Well, the media can be to blame.

Our lives are continually being led by media preference. We care about this shit because that's what they feed us. We are so conditioned to take in and then converse about the 'news' that we lap it up with no rejection. Take a step back. How much do you give a rats cunt that this washed up druggo slut is now in jail? Why do you care? Please tell me, I want to know. There must be something better to do than following this drug fuck whores path to jail?

Stories that gain so much popularity saddens me but also makes me pretty glad. Why? Because the more retards that lap up this shit means there are more individuals that are dumber than you and I. I’m no brain surgeon, don’t get me wrong, but I am disgusted by the shit that people are fascinated by in this day and age. The media can run anything they want. Think about that. They are feeding us garbage and we are becoming retards.  

Get a fucking clue. Pull your shit together because as it stands, others are pulling it together for us, and cramming it right back up our ass.

Do you think for yourself?

Do you rely on the media to give you ‘news’ to make you feel smart?

Read a book. Travel. Do anything except watch the fuckin 6oclock news! It is making you dumber, and I…………. want to kill you more. 

Black parents shock doctors with white baby

So... Theres no DNA evidence that this baby is in fact the product of the man in the picture, but the entire world has dubbed this a miracle baby? 

Until I see proof, I don't want to hear anyone tell me about this absolute horse shit story. Are we all fucking brain dead? 

Why is this even in the news? Your wife fucked another bloke mate...  

Wait. WAIT!! 

This may be genius in disguise . If indeed the husband has his doubts, he has done the right thing. Hopefully this bullshit leads to a public test! The man gets his answer (she cheated on him) the woman kills herself not being able to cope with the shame. 

You brilliant bastard, man in picture. Hats off to you sir!

Fucking 99% 

  

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS

I'm back to work and hence have exponentially less time to write, let alone stay awake past 3pm, but I'm back!! and with part one of what I will call the how to make friends series or better yet! How to not be hated by everyone.  

PART 1: THE KNOW IT ALL

No one likes a know it all.

If you are that guy / girl in the office who has the first answer to everyones question or goes out of your way to let everyone know the vast knowledge you have on a particular subject, I guarantee you are being laughed at behind your back. 

Everyone wants to think they are intelligent. If you takeover every situation with your answers, they are associating you! With them not being smart. Big mistake. It is almost always in most situations better to act like you are genuinely surprised by things that people tell you. Eg. 

A workmate tells you there are new speed cameras coming on july 16. 

Is your response: 

a ) Yeah! Everyone knows that. 

b ) Oh really? Well, we better not speed then. 

If you chose A, you may fall into the category known as the know-it-all. Even If you knew what they were telling you just act like it was news to you, people subconsciously feel better thinking they just added to your life. Perfecting this art takes practice but once implemented your on your way to making friends every time you converse with people.

Sometimes it's better to hold your tongue, let someone else have the light, you will soon notice people may talk to you, instead of laughing at you, behind your back. 

Give it a try. 

iPhone 4 Review brought to you by the legends at Engadget!!!

DO ENJOY!

HOW GULLIBLE ARE YOU?

I'm fascinated by persuasion. I wonder how persuasive I am? I'm always skeptical of anyone that tries to tell me to do something / sell me something for their benefit. I have zero interest in politics and have no direct contact with politicians whatsoever, but I am becoming ever more skeptical of them. 

What is their purpose? Do they really care for you and I? Do they really want to make it a better place for us to live? Why are there only ever 2 real competitive parties in any democratic government? Why aren't there 15 choices?  

We vote but does anything really change? Small level changes maybe, But what really changes for you and I. 

I say fuck all. 

We are bombarded with bullshit on a day to day basis via the TV news. 

What are your first thoughts when I say ISRAEL? 

Are you thinking bombs? Are you thinking constant bloodshed and terror? 

Have you been to Israel? 

If not, how do you come to such conclusions? 

Where did you see such things? 

Internet? News? Radio? 

What if Israel has been falsely represented by one media outlet and repeated by another, and another and so on? What if it was a beautiful place with fun loving people?

Because I can tell you it is. It is a wonderful place and I urge anyone to visit, and I guarantee you will have a great time.

Imagine if the powers that be, above our prime ministers and politicians, powers that these individuals wouldn't even know about, have hijacked our sources of information? Couldn't they just tell us what they wanted us to hear? 

For what? For whatever they need. 

I mean if we see it with our own eyes, it must be true right? 

How gullible are we?  

I think we, as a species need to look deeper into these types of issues. Lets say hypothetically you are a child killer. You are put in front of a camera which beams that feed to every household on earth. You are asked the dreaded question did you kill that child? 

You answer yes. You are now a child killer and the world hates and probably wants to kill you. If you answer no, you are free, the world has let you off the hook. 

Does this not still make you a child killer?    

Control information and you control perception. 

Mass media can change world perception with one story. Does that mean that story is true? Ask questions before being fed answers.

How gullible are you? 

MIND OF A SALESMAN - I am soooooo much better than you.

Every time I go into an electronics store in this country Im harassed by salesmen. Then when I tell them I'm just having a look they constantly ask a look at what? 

Ill fucking let you know mate, when I've decided what it is I'm fucking looking at. 

When you finally do find something and are in need of assistance 

(from another salesmen coz the first one is always the store cunt) 

the guy is rude about product availability, he starts asking questions about why you would want it etc, generally the most condescending dick you can probably come in contact with in a retail outlet in Sydney. 

Me               "Hey boss, you got any X in stock" 

Sales Clerk    "Oh haha we are like sold out"  

Me               "when are you getting more in?" 

Sales Cunt     "oh haha oh, they come in daily" 

Me               "so you're getting more in today?" 

Sales Cunt        "aah yeah we get more in liiiiike every day...." 

Me     "ok sweet can you contact me when they come in?" 

Sales Cunt      "I don't know how many we're liiiiiiike getting, and I don't know what time they are liiiiike going to get  here."

Me                "cool heres my number let me know when they arrive"

Sales Cunt        "hahaha no. we actually aren't meant to liiiiiike just sell  them... we cant take down liiiiiike the number of everyone who wants one so yeeeeeeeeeaah. 

Thanks for your help RETARD. 

What am I supposed to do. Stand in the store for 8 hours and wait for them to come in? Do I visit every hour on the fuckin hour and ask the cunt the same question?  

Fuck it!

Electronic stores in Australia are shit. Not all, but most.

Friendly  =  Sales 

Cunts  =  Fuck off I'm never shopping here again.  

Online is the way to go if you don't want to deal with people who:

a) Cant speak english 

b) Think they are better than you

c) Are cunts